My Britney Obsession

I know it has to be addressed. Most people find it confusing. Or offensive. Or just stupid.

I am obsessed with Britney Spears. Not just a little obsessed. COMPLETELY obsessed. Not quite as much as I used to be, but still pretty much captivated with her every move.

My boyfriend got me tickets to her Circus World Tour last year for Christmas hoping that if I saw her in concert I would calm down a little bit about her. It worked to a point. I no longer eat, sleep and breathe Britney but I do still obsess over her.

It didn't used to be this way. I actually used to think she was an idiot. I didn't like her voice and thought she was a bad influence on teenage girls. I liked some of her music, you have to admit some of it is QUITE catchy, but her voice was unimpressive to me. Her dancing however was phenominal. I have always loved dancing and greatly admired the way she moved.

As I grew older so did she. She went through some tough times in her life. One day I was watching television and they were covering her on some stalker show like TMZ or something. She had a look on her face like a scared rabbit and made a comment about being constantly harrassed and just wanting to be left alone. I started to take a closer look at Britney and her life. I realized that from the age of 8 she had never had a moment of privacy. EVERY move she made was in front of the camera. Her entire life was a story. Every photo taken of her was worth 10 times that of any other star. She was a paparzzi-magnet. She never got a moments peace. I started to pay closer attention to Britney's life. I started to feel sorry for her. I started to want to save her. I became obsessed with learning everything I could about her. I wanted to dance like her, dress like her, be her. I told everyone I would marry her if given the chance. This was the truth. And I didn't even mention the ROCK HARD body she totes around when she is working out properly. I mean, seriously people, have you seen it? I think I fell a little bit in love with Britney Spears.

It got to the point that I had more pictures of Britney on my MySpace back then than I did of my kids. That was the point I realized I had a problem. I started to tone it down a little. These days I admire at a "somewhat distance" trying to keep things under control. I haven't posted a new picture of her on facebook in a LONG time. That doesn't mean I don't look at them though. I'm not really sure I will ever get completely over her but I am trying.

Britney is making a lot of progress in her life as well. Her dad had to take over her entire life. Her finances, decisions, physical well being, everything. She completely fell apart. I have tried to think of what that would feel like as a person but I can't. I do however, know the personality type that would get to that point. I have a daughter who could very easily get to that point. I think that may be why I was so attracted to Britney in the beginning. I think I wanted to save her. I wanted to go to her, wrap my arms around her and tell her everything was going to be okay. It seemed to take forever for someone in her family to take that step.

Britney has proven that no amount of money in life can take care of the basics. You have to have family, you have to have love, stability and control of yourself. And no amount of money can make you happy.

I would probably still marry Britney if she asked me. But I would keep Bill too. And he would be okay with that. What guy wouldn't? :) :) :)